Growing up as GenXers and Millenials, we were used to being courted by cringe-worthy advertising attempts at youthful cool that had about as much verisimilitude as Steve Buscemi sidling up with his skateboard and backward cap. We might blame boomers for this style of “Hey kids, what’s the 411, yo?” trash, but that much-maligned demographic of those born from around 1946 to 1960 was subject to similarly hacky try-hard marketing over the years.
Case in point, one of the largest car makers in the world foisted a rather weak cash grab upon that generation, and they didn’t fall for it any more than we did.
The car in question was the Cadillac Cimarron, an ill-conceived luxury car aimed at Boomers during the early eighties, specifically those that had eschewed the hippie “no possessions” sensibilities of their youth and now primarily wanted money and all the crap that can come with it. The sales debacle that was the Cimarron is well documented, but what if I told you GM had all the ingredients for a car that could have completed the Cimarron’s mission, but actually been worthy of the Cadillac badge and indeed a good car? Let’s get into it.
You Look Just Like Your Less Successful Brother
Look, there’s nothing wrong with platform sharing. Every large car maker does it, and most do it rather successfully. Cadillac did it quite well for years; people buying a GM C-body based Fleetwood or even the Chevy Nova-based Cadillac Seville felt they were getting their money’s worth for the premium that they were spending. Still, this practice can be a slippery slope; boy did Cadillac slip and slide on their ass with this form of creating new models in the early eighties.
Cadillac knew that successful boomers were passing right by their dealership with pockets full of cash and taking it down the street to the BMW, Mercedes, or Audi dealerships. What they needed was a small high-end sedan, and they saw what they thought would have been the perfect answer in the new-for-1982 GM “J” cars that replaced their Vega-based compacts. If this seems like an unlikely source for a car intended to beat the E21 320i or a Saab 900, you’re right; look at any one of those dopey “Ten Biggest Marketing Failures In Automotive History” and I guarantee that the Cimarron will be in the top five.
The Cimarron failed in two major ways. First, while earlier Cadillacs were unrecognizable from their platform cousins from lesser brands, the Cimmaron was virtually identical in appearance to the half-the-price Chevy Cavalier. Secondly, the Cimarron could have possibly succeeded if it had performance and road manners that rivaled the European competitors; if you’ve ever driven a J-car and seen how good GM was at getting torque steer out of a woefully underpowered car, you’ll know that wasn’t the case. Cadillac eventually added a V6 option for Cimarron and did subtle upgrades, but few if any yuppies fell for the thing. In fact, I have heard that many if not most Cimarrons were bought by traditional Cadillac buyers that just wanted a little car from the same dealership.
In typical GM fashion, they ignored cars that were right under their noses from their own brands which might have been worthwhile propositions for younger people of means that listened to Fleetwood Mac or Jimmy Buffet instead of Bing Crosby. I’ve proposed one option already that we can revisit, and also found an even better concept to follow that up which might have done a Lexus-like ambush of Bavarian and Scandanavian stalwarts. I’m not kidding. Let’s take a look.
Bitter Pill To Swallow
Some time back, I looked at the Cimarron conundrum that GM had of trying to find a car that would meet the Europeans head-on. What could they do? You know, how could they offer a German-built rear-drive high-end sedan with a straight six and four-wheel independent suspension, four-wheel disc brakes and an available five-speed manual? Something like, I don’t know, an Opel Senator? You mean a car that GM was actually making already? Yeah, apparently they didn’t see the potential of this rather underrated chassis, but Austrian coachbuilder Erich Bitter certainly did when he rebodied the Senator and sold it as the Bitter SC coupe.
In my alternate reality, GM would have reached a deal with Erich in 1982 to make a federalized-and-Cadillac-branded four-door Opel Senator sedan with Bitter-designed nose, tail, and door skins (Two door coupes would remain branded as Bitters with a larger engine and sold through select Cadillac or Oldsmobile dealers). The end result I dubbed the “Cadillac Cantata:”
You can see that it looked rather fetching compared to other $20,000 to $30,000 German rivals of the time such as a scaled-up Passat (Audi 5000), a Bimmer with a low revving “eta” engine (528e) and a car that sounded like the engine was eating itself when it was idling (w123 300D):
Inside the trimmed-up Opel interior would be more lavish looking than that rather antiseptic cabins of the German rivals, and the Bitter-style tail of the car would be spiced up with wide, tri-colored taillamps (yes, they’re Cimarron units turned upside down).
As I said in my earlier post, I firmly believe that this Russelsheim-built Cadillac would have been a success in the market; maybe not the gangbusters windfall of the 1975 Seville but absolutely better than the Cimarron. Even if it didn’t sell outrageously well, GM certainly wouldn’t have lost the corporate credibility they did with the overpriced Cavalier that really damaged Cadillac’s reputation to this day.
Let’s say the Cantata did become at least a minor hit, or at least was worthy of a successor. What would that look like? I think I know a great place to start.
A Mercedes Fauxster?
I don’t watch those cooking shows, but I’m well aware that even if two chefs use the same ingredients one can create a culinary masterpiece while another can get a full-on dressing down by Gordon Ramsey. In the automotive realm, it’s the same situation. Carroll Shelby put American muscle into an old British AC Ace sports car and struck gold with the Cobra. Rover put a more upmarket-looking new body and interior onto a reliable-as-taxes Acura Legend and got a poorly built mess with the Sterling 825.
You’d think that an Italian-designed and built Cadillac roadster would be a can’t-miss proposition, but we know now that wasn’t the case. Pininfarina created a crisp, understated-looking design of a convertible for the Cadillac Allante and hand-crafted the body and interior at a special facility outside of Turin. Next, the firm put in an Italian-massaged Corvette C4 drivetrain and chassis and … no, I’m just kidding. The bodies were flown at great expense by custom 747 cargo jets to Detroit’s Hamtramck plant (“a 7000 mile long assembly line”) where a buzz-kill engine and underpinnings from Cadillac’s lame scaled-down front-wheel-drive Eldorado were stuffed into the thing. Yes, that’s really what happened.
With GM’s malaise-era track record, you wouldn’t be surprised to hear that there were issues, such as leaking and hard-to-put-up (manual) tops plus malfunctioning digital gauges. These kinds of slip-ups were especially disappointing when the key rival of the Allante was the R107 Mercedes roadster, a by-then ancient ride that nonetheless has to be one of the finest quality and most durable products in the history of the automobile. Truth be told, the idea of going after the 560SL at all was a fool’s game that was inexplicably tried by others unsuccessfully as well with cars like the Chrysler TC By Maserati and Buick Reatta convertible. Seriously, the idea of strictly two-seat luxury-biased convertible doesn’t make much sense, and even the ones with a three-pointed star on the front had a limited market; the rest of the entrants to that segment never stood a chance.
Once again, GM had the ingredients but misused them. A shame, since they had what they needed for a product that, in retrospect, might have been a winner (or, at the very least, not a loser).
The Second Generation Cantata
In the alternative Cimarron-free universe, the first Bitter-like Cantata I proposed would have run its course by about 1986, and Cadillac could have applied some of the efforts wasted on the Allante towards something that might have generated more than snickers from Munich, Stuttgart, and Gothenburg. In fact, it might have given them a run for their money.
Here’s how it would go: for the 1987 model year, The General released a new version of the car on which the first “Bitter” Cantata would have been based, the Opel Senator. Still powered by a straight six spinning the rear wheels, this updated executive sedan could be bought with a five-speed manual if you wanted to skip the four-speed slushbox.
Cadillac would need to adapt to this new Senator for the next generation Cantata. Could the 1987 Cantata have just been a barely tweaked new Senator? Probably not. The Senator was a decent car but a decade later GM proved that releasing an Opel relatively unchanged for the US market was a Cimmaron-style mistake. Remember that in 1997 Cadillac tried to sell the Senator’s replacement (Opel Omega) in the US as the Catera; it wasn’t a horrible vehicle but it just had nothing to make it stand out in terms of looks and performance in a market that was by then saturated with very good German and by then Japanese choices as well.
Consequently, for our 1987 Cantata we need to add a little pizazz to the Opel, and we know just the guys to do it: our Pininfarina friends in Turin. A Cantata based on the visual language that was used for the Allante works surprisingly well. Scaling up the overall height, windshield rake, and body section doesn’t kill the looks. You know that The Bishop is a fanboy of angular cars, the Pininfarina products of this era (especially the lovely Alfa Romeo 164) were a nice contrast to the German cars and the bar-of-soap direction that even mainstream Fords had embraced at the time.
As with the first (alternate reality) 1983-1986 model, General Motors would set up a separate assembly line at Opel to build the Cantata and ship fully assembled German cars to the US.
Ah, but there’s more. Cadillac would offer a full line of Cantatas, including the first pillarless hardtop coupe from the brand since the early seventies. Here’s something with style and decent rear seat room to combat the E-Class coupe (and far more space than a BMW 6 series). While we’re at it, let’s send a few examples over to Heinz Prechter’s ASC for the roof to be chopped off entirely. The end result looks a bit like an Allante that’s been Stretch Armstronged, but it visually works (better than the two-place roadster if anything). It certainly would have worked from a marketing standpoint; we all know two-seaters are fun but ripping out a back seat will easily chop the sales figures of any car by at least half. The Cantata Cabriolet would have much of that high-end drop-top market to itself; the W124 cabrio wasn’t around yet. What other real four-seat luxury convertibles were there then?
Inside, I’ve always liked the Allante’s angular interior but thought it looked a bit too cheap. You couldn’t sell a high-end German car in America in the late eighties without real walnut on the dash, so I’ve added some wood slabs and softened up just a few of the overly harsh edges on the dash:
Under the hood, the 3.0 liter straight six would pump out around 175 horsepower, but a year or so later the Senator offered a 24-valve version of the motor we could use that pushed power closer to 200.
That’s a full lineup with something for every successful boomer, right? Still not convinced? Fine. My alternate universe small Cadillac has one more trick up its sleeve to turn Mr. Yuppie’s head, the coup de gras for many of the European competitors. Remember that back in 1987 if you wanted a long-roof high-end Euro car you had limited choices. Your picks included the blocky Volvo 740 series or their medieval 1966-era 240 series, the Audi 5000 Avant (with an angled roof that made it more of a hatchback), or a w124 Mercedes estate with vinyl seats that cost as much as a house (the BMW touring models weren’t available stateside for many more years).
I’ll just leave this here for you:
Turin, Russelsheim, and Bathurst?
Can you even imagine comparing the Bavarian rivals with a tarted-up Chevy Cavalier? GM really asked the public to do that with a Cimarron with a straight face. It’s a shame that the Standard Of The World brand didn’t bring a little more of that world to their small car efforts, like with this alternative universe Cantata. Even if they couldn’t make a Michelin Star-level meal out of their ingredients, Cadillac certainly could have done better than Old Country Buffett.
Look, we already know there will be at least one comment from a reader stating that the top-level Opel sedans ultimately lacked the feel of a BMW or the brick-shithouse feel of a Benz. I totally agree, and you know what? It doesn’t matter. Buyers would be more intrigued by the fact that they could have bought a German-built car with Italian-penned looks inside and out at an American high-end dealership; the Cantata would have had a style that the others didn’t. Tuning the chassis to be more biased to ride than handling might be a good move as well; Lexus learned a few years later that their target market doesn’t necessarily do laps around the ‘Ring.
Don’t worry, though; I’ve got German and Italian ingredients in the Cantata mix, but now I need to put in some Vegamite. If Cadillac made a Touring Sedan version of the Cantata powered by a motor with two more cylinders than the concurrent E28 or E34 BMW M5 and Peter Brock-tuned suspension bits from a Holden Commodore, people in the big round towers of Munich would brush it off but in reality not be happy. Not happy at all.
I’ll take my Cantana Touring Wagon with a V8 and an energy polarizer, thank you.
Our Daydreaming Designer Solves Cadillac’s Problem From 40 Years Ago – The Autopian
So basically make it the ’92 Seville?
Uh, a ’92 Seville was front wheel drive, bigger, and made in America. But other than that the same thing.
Stylingwise though, very similar, but five years later.
I wish this was an alternative future TV series, like For All Mankind.
You could have the story told from the perspective of a family who had an X Body Seville that they were on the fence about and were Euro-curious as the 80s arrived but then the Bitter designed Cantara stole their hearts and the family are Cadillac brand loyalists from then on.
Nice idea, but sadly wouldn’t have realistically happened.
My understanding is that, back in the day, GM and Ford’s American and European (and Australian for that matter) operations were effectively seperate, and sometimes competing, divisions. They seldom talked to each other, and mostly ran independently from each other with minimal sharing.
The original Holden Commodore was released in ’78, and was based on the GM V-platform (same as Opel Rekord, Senator, and Commodore, and Vauxhall Carlton).
Funnily enough, it’s the same year / platform referenced above by The Bishop.
Given that a Bitter SC is one of my dream cars to own, you had me at “Cantata”.
Wow these are unexpectedly attractive. Well done Mr Bishop.
Thanks- just taking what was already there.
I feel that if GM had just done an *adequate* job (ie. Standard V6 from the start, interior derived from one of the other J-Bodies instead of the nastiest and cheapest one with some chrome and plastiwood slathered over it) the Cimarron would at least not have been an embarrassment.
I love both pretend generations of this pretend Cantata. Is the tata part of the name in remembrance of the 1950’s Cadillac Dagmar bumpers?
I would agree, but then GM did almost exactly this in creating the Catera and look how well that turned out. Was styling the issue? The reliability of the Ellesmere V6 certainly was. Maybe since your Cantata looks better and has the earlier straight six things would have been different.
Styling is always an issue. The V6 in the Catera was lackluster regardless of the reliability, which seemingly was not any better. At least the Lincoln LS gave you a V8 option.
Americans talk about the poor reliability of the Catera but there are still loads of them, with lunar journey mileages, hammering around Europe. Usually being worked in their old ages as tow pigs for race car trailers or caravans.
Yes, but Europeans could have them with the simple Family II or an ultra-durable diesel. The Ellesmere V6 had a reputation here for chewing its timing belt tensioners leading to catastrophic valvegear damage, something it did in equal measure under the hood of Saturn L200s and Saab 9-5s as well.
Stop making me want things that don’t even exist Bishop!!!!
I definitely want the V8 Touring Wagon—and don’t even care if it comes with magic crystals
My takeaway from this is that the Allante maybe really should have been Cadillac’s new design language for the ’80s, instead of what we got, which was basically chrome door handles, vertical tail lights, and egg crate grille tacked onto boxy cookie cutter GM sedans that looked indistinguishable from Oldsmobiles or Buicks when viewed from the side.
GM had seriously considered rebadging the Opel Diplomat as a Cadillac in the mid ’70s, but the West German Deutschemark/US Dollar exchange rate would have cut into profit margins and the US favorites were not capable of assembling the car with the same, precise tolerances, and it was concluded that the cost of re-engineering to suit looser American manufacturing practices was about the same as tooling for an all-new car, so we got the Seville instead
The Diplomat was pretty dated by 1977 anyway, and sort of an odd mix of American styling with a few European cues. The Senator, on the other hand, had a true international look, but it also would have been expensive with the exchange rate, and most traditional Cadillac buyers wouldn’t have noticed.
However, European car buyers could tell the difference, and if Cadillac was truly looking for conquest sales it needed something more serious.
By the ’80s, yeah, but in the ’70s, Cadillac’s only significant overseas market was Iran, and their tastes were surprisingly well-aligned. Turns out Iranians really liked button tufted seats and vinyl roofs, maybe we’re not so different after all
I actually really like the looks of the first Seville. It’s a traditional malaise American car but the proportions and size are just great. As I said though, I was going to try to lure Euro car buyers, using myself as a Guinea pig . I’ve driven nothing but (used 50,000 to 100,000 mile) German cars over the last twenty years, and what would make a jerk like me go into a Caddy dealership?
If I take off my glasses and look at the Cantada coupe it’s kinda like a Ferrari 400.
Making a Cadillac out of a Bitter is a bold move. It also works out better cost wise since it’s a larger car than the J body so it competes with the 5 Series, W123, Audi 5000 and 7 Series Volvo instead of the smaller and cheaper 3 Series, 190 etc. The bigger car can have a higher MSRP so either more profit or cushion to absorb costs like an exchange rate bump which affected the last gasp of Saturn. Would Cantata Herald a series of chamber music themed Cadillacs?
For extra fun by the mid 80s you could offer AWD. Ferguson converted a bunch of Senators for the BRIXMIS intelligence unit, although they preferred to use G Wagens.
1966 Ford T-Birds pulled that off.
You mean that fiberglass cap that Lee Iacocca put over the back seat as an option? That’s actually kind of a cool idea, and it doesn’t eliminate the back seat.
The Lincoln mark 8 is like this Cantata coupe.
Never rode on one but it looked like fun in in the hoovies video I watched recently.
It’s like a Mustang in a suit. I almost bought one but the steering feel was lacking, but I liked the looks, tire hump and all.
I guess bringing the mark 8 up here is kinda silly cause that was mid 90s.
The mark 7 with the ugly trunk from the 80s is better comp.
This Cantata looks way cooler
But after reading up on the mark 7… that thing could be had with a diesel bmw engine, car phone , Versace edition, composite headlights air suspension. That’s crazy to think about
Eldorado still looks cooler then mark 7
Your Cantatas are, to my eye at least, vaguely reminiscent of the 4th gen Seville STS and the 12th gen Eldorado. I always liked that Seville in particular, and the Eldorado would have been really nice looking if not for the unfortunate C pillar design, which is fixed on that Cantata coupe.
Those two cars seemed to be very much influenced by the Allante, though as I mentioned the in-house designers were annoyed that a once-in-a-lifetime design opportunity like a roadster was sent overseas.
The vertical rear window line always did seem a bit disconcerting, but then it did on the original 1967 Eldorado as well.
Good point.. I get why they did it, heritage or whatever, but it just didn’t look right. It was make even worse when the old folks (and dealerships) started tacking faux landau roofs on the damn things.
I think both of those cars (and the Allante) would have been so much better as RWD cars. Not just from the performance perspective, but the shorter overhangs of an RWD car would have suited the otherwise clean styling better. The front overhang on those cars is awkward looking to me. But hey, it’s GM.
Great piece. Your Cantata coupe and sedan are handsome. As a kid I couldn’t understand why GM and Ford didn’t do something like this with the Senator and Euro Granada. These were good looking cars, rear drive, well engineered, and already being built in volume. They could actually compete. GM domestic had nothing like it and consumers were defecting in droves to imports. It seemed like a no brainer at the time and even more so in hindsight as you pointed out.
What a mess GM was. As an outsider, things make no sense. Front drive was an edict and there was no way around it. They forced the divisions to share sheetmetal with other platform mates. The bustle back Seville had to use the Eldorado hood! On the other hand also in terms of Cadillac, they spent a ton of money developing the truly terrible 4.1 V8 which, aside from being unreliable and underpowered, had no actual reason to exist. They had the small block chevy. They had a small block Oldsmobile. They had a small block Buick. They may have even still had a Pontiac V8. They had the turbo Buick V6 in development. One of these could’ve been massaged, re-engineered, whatever it took for much less money and Cadillac owners would’ve been thrilled. I do not understand the decision making at GM.
Ford did consider selling the first generation (1972) Euro Granada as the Lincoln Mark I. Hard to say if it would have sold since it was a bit before european touring sedans hit their stride in the market in the early 80s.
Another Lincoln What If: The 1973 Mark I Ghia Concept – Mac’s Motor City GarageMac’s Motor City Garage (macsmotorcitygarage.com)
Ford waited until the Scorpio to bring in a Euro Ford, but it was a hatchback which were sadly a non-starter bodystyle in American then for an expensive sedan.
That euro Granada with the Rolls Royce/Mark IV grill is something else. I guess they couldn’t resist and later grafted it onto the US Ford Granada to make a Versailles. Thanks for the link.
The Scorpio was a really nice car. I sat in one at the auto show and the interior was a substantial upgrade from say an Audi 5000. My recollection is they indeed had difficulty moving them — the local Lincoln/Merc dealer was eventually selling them for $15K which was around $9K off sticker. $24K is about $60K in today’s dollars. No wonder.
Great point! Why create great engines and put them in only one car then develop crap engines as well
I like everything about this but the name.
I had a hard time with it. “Carnitas” didn’t work. I gave up after that.
I actually like this. The “Estate” version is particularly fetching.
So, what you’re saying is… GM shoulda gone “Mercur” on this problem.
yes and no. I wouldn’t make up a new brand, and the styling would be totally different from the European models. It would have to be; as I said, the Catera was virtually unchanged and didn’t sell. The Merkurs were two hatchbacks, one competing against luxury sedans and one with a “biplane” spoiler; I love them but it’s a wonder they sold as many as they did here.
Had the same thought. These also look a LOT like the early ’90s Seville/Eldorado design language that was cribbed from the Allante.
Indeed, the STS picks up a lot of that. Those were a huge improvement over the 1986-1991 models and underrated styling in my opinion.
I do know that the internal design team hated the fact that the Allante was sent overseas for design. They had to do all of the bread-and-butter Cadillacs but when it came time to do a roadster GM took it away from them. Apparently top brass said that it was nothing personal but they were looking to make a Gucci handbag kind of car.
That Seville is one of the best-looking sedans ever. I’d love to find one with a pre-Nopestar HT motor.
Yes, Seville in a driveway near me with the little Northstar thing on the trunk lid. Hasn’t moved since we got our house here in 2014.
“Hasn’t moved since we got our house here in 2014.”
I’m sure it just needs a battery, and maybe a brake pad or two.
There was a cavalier convertible, there could have been a Cimarron convertible. It could have taken some of the Lebaron’s market share. Still the only good Cimarron is the PPG one in the GM Heritage Collection
Oh man, I’d forgotten about those magic crystals.
You see, the issue with all of this is that it makes a hell of a lot of sense and that’s why malaise-era GM didn’t do it. GM has had numerous opportunities to really build something world class and have always fumbled in the most absurd way possible.
Actually, they sometimes fix the problematic models after four of five years, but by then the sales are in the toilet and GM has to cancel them (read Corvair, Fiero, Allante….)
I like – but my alternate universe sees a J-car Cimarron that’s actually been upgraded a-la Seville – with an intro date a couple years after the other 4 J’s came out.
Stretch it, square off the roofline, do something to the trunk that gives it some pizzazz, with a bespoke dash/IP – with a massaged V6/5-speed as standard equipment.
Then give us a hardtop coupe and convertible too.
No, J-Car chassis would never be seen as a valid competitor for any of the German cars. You could make a Seville-like luxury thing out of it? Maybe? But not something a yuppie would buy.
Why not?
Yuppies bought plenty of 3 Series, Saabs, Volvos and Audi 4000s – did they not? Why couldn’t Cadillac have merely met the challenge of the cars they targeted in their advertising?
Plenty of Cadillac owners decided a stretched Nova was a good-enough substitute for a 450SEL….
As I mentioned, Cadillac did sell as many as 25,000 Cimarrons in two model years (1985 and 86) so it did find some buyers, but a large percentage were supposedly Cadillac owners that wanted a small car, just like Cadillac owners decided that a stretched Nova was a great substitute for a 450SEL.
However, I’m talking about getting serial Euro car owners to come to a Cadillac dealership. Would a 450SEL (or even 190E, 240DL, 320i or Saab 900) buyer consider a fancy J-car? Absolutely not. One drive around the block or even just sitting in it and you know it isn’t even close.
I’d like to invite The Bishop to embrace the awfulness of the Cimarron and conceptualize a compact Cadillac based on the Vega Kammback. 1971-2 or impact bumper, your choice.(At least you can put a V8 in it!) Thank you.
A Senator-based 80s Cadillac is a good thought experiment, but I don’t think a straight six would have gotten past the prodcut-planning people, let alone potential customers. Sure it was a good engine, but a detuned TPI 350 out of a Z-28 or Corvette would have been better for the American market. I also think the Bitter SC’s styling is a stretch too far for a Cadillac, lacking any of the Cadillac’s visual signifiers of brand character. Sure, the Cimarron was terrible but at least they gestured in that direction with the $100 or whatever the per-unit budget must have been for exterior changes.
The Senator platform proportions work well for a Cadillac Euro-coupe, especially the long dash-to-axle, but GM had plenty of talented designers (like Dick Ruzzin, who had been at Opel in the 70s and later headed the Cadillac studio in the era when they did the good Seville) who could have made a great Cadillac out of the Bitter SC without spending too many piles of money on tooling on, at least, a new front end. I think flip-up headlamps are a bit much on a Cadillac.
I would like to have seen a V8 option on either generation of the “Cantata” and it could have been done. No, the Bitter does not have Cadillac styling cues and that’s kind of the point to get different buyers.