Five months ago, The Autopian promised you, dear readers, that — if you became a member of this esteemed website — we’d purchase a Pontiac Aztek, I’d daily drive it for a month, and then I’d sleep in it for a week. Well, we have the Aztek, we are finishing up editing an incredible video of how we crashed the Pebble Beach Concours d’Elegance with it, and now it’s time for me to daily drive the thing, but I just don’t want to.
You’re going to say I’ve gone soft, and on some level, maybe I have. My BMW i3 requires no gasoline, it’s quiet, it’s luxurious, it has bluetooth so I can take business calls while stuck in traffic (where I spend much of my life), it’s reliable, it’s small and easy to park, and I could go on and on.
The Autopian’s Pontiac Aztek — a ridiculously practical machine that’s in insanely good condition given its $3,600 price — is very few of these things. It’s a gas guzzler; it’s spartan inside; it’s stuck in the worst period of automotive entertainment (just before auxiliary ports, just after cassette tapes, thus requiring me to use the dreaded FM transmitter to play music/phones over the speakers); it’s decently reliable but given its age much less so than the i3; it’s big and hard to park; it’s loud; and its worst fault? It’s got a four-speed slushbox that just makes the thing feel slow and lifeless.
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I know, I’m being a baby. But it’s true — going from a 1965 Plymouth Valiant/1985 Jeep J10/2000 Chevy Tracker/1993 Jeep Grand Cherokee/etc etc to a 2014 BMW i3 really ruined me. Maybe it was age, too, or maybe it was just LA’s chaos. Yeah, I bet that’s it; in Michigan, daily driving an old car was honestly a joy. It was a smooth, quiet, almost calming thing. In LA it’s OMG YOU’RE GONNA DIE THERE’S A BIKER SPLITTING LANES OH AND A HUGE SEMI TRUCK AND A FORD RANGER WITH A 12 FOOT TALL LOAD IN THE BED OH WAIT WHY IS SOMEONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD WHY IS EVERYONE HONKING OH WAIT I’M JUST SITTING STILL.
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So today it begins. September 17 to October 17: One month of Pontiac Aztek Daily Driving. Will the car last a month? Will I fall in love with it (again)? Will I grow to loath it?
Guess I’m about to find out.
The hot setup would be to find the optional tent attachment for the rear hatchback and have a camper!
Wow. The guy that spent life in bad jeep after bad jeep took no time to get californiafied.
When you’re done dailying it, and living in it, and whatever other shenanigans-for-Autopian-content may be planned, you need to road trip it to Michigan and take it to the Pontiac Transportation Museum. Maybe you could even loan it to them, or just donate it, since you may never want to spend another mile in it after that trip.
If I become a member, does it turn off the auto-playing videos? That’s really all I want. The “become a member” page just says you see “fewer” ads.
David, I think you missed out on a good money making opportunity. You should put a live camera in the Aztek and charge people for the ability to log in and check up on you. I mean, how do we know you’re really living in the van? .. lol
It’s sad to say but that Aztek is a step up from my current daily driver. But I don’t daily drive that much these days thanks to WFH. Didn’t drive yesterday, probably won’t drive today, but did wrench on a car yesterday.
There are worse vehicles to daily for a month. This has comfy seats, the slushbox is slushy for being stuck in traffic and it’s very practical.
Not sure why this would be impressive or desirable. Ok, it looks a bit wonky and it’s expensive to run. But it’s got room and it should be relatively reliable.
However living for a month in that i3 in the other hand would be quite another matter. I think after night or two it would get quite interesting.
“it’s stuck in the worst period of automotive entertainment (just before auxiliary ports, just after cassette tapes, thus requiring me to use the dreaded FM transmitter to play music/phones over the speakers)”
You’ve got a double DIN in that dash right?
So upgrade already!
LS4 swap yo 😀
Came to make this same comment.
“it’s quite, it’s luxurious…”
It’s quite what, though? Man, the mid-aughts GM ownership hits harder than I thought. Coming up next: “I no wat I got, no tier kickers!”
The Autopian’s spellchecker is also from the mid 2000s
They don’t need a spell checker (it’s spelled right), they need a grammar checker 🙂
It’s a typo. My grammar is fire [pats Strunk & White on the desk].
You better not be committing journalism with a copy of Strunk & White as your guide, I tell you what.
It’s happening!!!
I do understand about the stereo; my mom is a very firm believer in stock vehicles, so her ’03 TJ still has its factory-installed CD player. I keep a couple of mix CD-Rs out there just in case.
I am a very strong believer in stock vehicles, especially stock radios, because about half of my cars have aftermarket radios and they’re all horrible
I’ve had decent luck with aftermarket stereos (although anything would be an improvement compared to a ’90s Chrysler tape deck).
You can get a factory stereo for the TJ that has a bluetooth module installed in it. Plug and play with the TJ harness, and streaming music from your iPhone or android. http://www.1factoryradio.com. I have one in my 2003 TJ and it works fine.
Neat!
Just because it has the stock radio doesn’t mean you can’t add an aux input. Manny radios of the 2000s had one that you could access with the right plug on the back, and many of those that didn’t you could find and intercept the pre-amplified radio output with a switched 3.5mm jack to add it. I’ve done both in various vehicles to keep things stock while adding functionality, either with a wired 3.5mm audio cable or a hidden Bluetooth receiver
Bruh, I daily’d a Chevy Venture for 12 months a couple of years ago. I actually loved it- Very relaxing, comfortable vehicle. I’ve never driven an Aztek, but given it shares the same U body platform, I can’t think it would be that bad?
Living in the tent though- That’s going to be funny.
Is this a well-crafted prelude to the next article where you espouse that driving an older car has rekindled your love of crapboxes again?
Lol! You have gone so soft. You call that thing huge?
Driving a golden Aztek for Hispanic Heritage month is definitely a…choice?
Here’s the thing: if Dottie/Elise spends a night Aztekkin’ with David, it’s one more tick on the “keeper” list.
I’m honestly surprised that you think LA traffic is so panic inducing. I always found Detroit to be far more devoid of any sort of rules or common sense. Plus it was an obstacle course of potholes and broken pavement that people navigated at 80 miles an hour. Any time I’ve driven in LA I found it languid by comparison.
There just aren’t as many cars in Detroit. That space between me and other cars is what makes me feel safe.
Here in Chicago we have both the high speeds and the volume, which means people will merge into any opening that is at least as long as their car, at any speed.
That’s why we all try to follow the car ahead of us by 3/4 car lengths and not 3 seconds… Safety!
I lived and drove a lot in LA for years and never came close to an accident. You just need to drive like the locals. Which isn’t to say driving like a maniac. That’s more of a San Francisco thing.
In my experience SF traffic isn’t any crazier than anywhere else from Gilroy to Sacramento.
DT living in an Aztek for my entertainment is finally coming to fruition?
I guess things are lookin’ up for ol’ Taargus Taargus!