Good morning, and welcome back to Shitbox Showdown! Today we’re looking at two old American cars equipped with what was once the default powertrain option. But first let’s check out the results from Friday’s big battle:
It’s the big Caddy by a nose over the diesel Benz. But more importantly, are you all with me on the soundtrack to your drive home?
Hell yes. And ska or punk does suit a big Caddy really well – I once knew a guy who had a Coupe DeVille about this age, with a functioning 8-track player, and he used to record his own 8-tracks to play in it. He’d tape over things he got at garage sales for next to nothing; once I was riding with him and he popped in a John Denver tape, and Black Flag came out of the speakers. It was glorious.
Moving on: For decades, nearly all American cars stuck to the same formula when it came to base engine and transmission options: an inline six and a three-speed manual gearbox driving the rear wheels via a solid axle. Businessman’s coupe, family sedan, station wagon, pickup truck; it didn’t matter. If you left all the option boxes blank on the order form, you got a straight six and a three-speed stick, usually column-shifted. Many cars so equipped have had their engines or transmissions swapped since then, but not these two. Let’s take a look and see which standard-equipment car you prefer.
1963 Mercury Comet Custom – $3,000
Engine/drivetrain: 144 or 170 cubic inch overhead valve inline 6, three-speed manual, RWD
Location: Albuquerque, NM
Odometer reading: unknown
Runs/drives? Yep
Ford’s erstwhile Mercury division was axed in 2011, and hasn’t really been missed much, frankly. Most Mercury models were more or less just Fords with fancier trim by the end. But once upon a time, Mercury models were more distinct from their Ford counterparts. This Comet is based on the first-generation Ford Falcon, but has a longer wheelbase and a “big car” look courtesy of quad headlights.
1963 was the first year a V8 was available in the Comet, but this one makes do with Ford’s “Thriftpower” inline six, though the seller doesn’t specify which displacement. They do say it runs and drives, but that’s about all the information we get. It’s a good durable engine, and served Ford well for a lot of years after this, still living under the hoods of various Fox-body cars as late as 1983. And a three-speed stick is about as simple as transmissions get; if it goes into all the gears, it’s fine.
This Comet is a little cosmetically challenged, both inside and out. It’s not rusty, at least, but it’s all in primer red, and judging by the door sills, not all the body parts were originally the same color. It looks as though someone started to restore it, and then ran out of time, or money, or gumption, or all three. But honestly, it doesn’t look too bad as-is.
It’s not nice enough to show off as-is, nor is it worth the money it would take to restore it. But it’s a solid, reliable car that could be a daily driver for the right person. That person might very well be the bass player in a rockabilly band, or a bartender at a tiki-themed bar, or maybe both…
1975 Pontiac Firebird with parts car – $3,500
Engine/drivetrain: 250 cubic inch inline 6, three-speed manual, RWD
Location: Moriarty, NM
Odometer reading: 106,000 miles
Runs/drives? Runs, but needs a new clutch
It’s easy to forget that base-model Firebirds exist at all. We tend to remember the Trans Ams and the Formulas and the Esprits, but it was possible to get Pontiac’s pony car in a plain brown wrapper. It came with a Chevy 250 cubic inch inline six, backed by a three-speed manual with a Hurst floor shifter. It has no spoiler on the back, no scoops or nostrils on the hood, and of course, no screaming chicken decals. But this lack of gingerbread lets the second-generation F-body’s clean lines take center stage. It’s a good design.
This sale includes not only the ’75 base model, but a ’75 Trans Am parts car as well. The Trans Am has no engine, transmission, hood, or title, which means it’s truly only a parts car. The seller isn’t clear which parts from the Trans Am they intended to use to fix up the other one, but they seem willing to discuss things with the right buyer. The base model car does run, but the clutch is shot, so it’s not drivable.
Inside, it’s dirty and sun-cracked, but it’s all stuff that can be replaced via various aftermarket catalogs, if you wanted. As it sits, it’s functional, at least. The seller has done a bunch of mechanical work to it – the fuel tank, fuel pump, starter, carb, and all fluids have been changed – but it still needs a clutch, and probably new tires, to be roadworthy.
The trouble is that restoring this car would cost just about as much as restoring a Trans Am, and it wouldn’t be worth nearly as much when it’s finished, so there’s little incentive to do a full restoration on it. But frankly, it’s a hell of a lot more interesting than a Trans Am, to me, at least. I guess if you’re willing to live with the patina, a clutch isn’t too hard to do, and you’d have a fun classic to bomb around in.
These days, of course, “standard” transmissions are anything but, and pushrod inline sixes are extinct. And internal combustion itself is slowly falling out of favor. These cars are remnants of the past that make for conversation-starting toys rather than basic transportation. But that’s not a bad second life. Which one speaks to you?
(Image credits: Craigslist sellers)
If the Firebird were either two years older or two years newer, I’d grab it in a heartbeat. But this pair is so cheap because they’re right in the middle of the ugly-ass-front-end years. Too much work for a car with a butterface.
Good thing I love old Mercurys!
Not the original engine in the Comet. It’s a 200 from a newer car.
Blue valve cover, PCV valve, and EGR valve were all much later than 1963.
I’d still take it over the Firebird.
This was actually surprisingly hard. The base model Firebird has a appeal of it’s one,but is probably not worth the money to get presentable,although I think I like the base model more than the Trans-Am an the like. The Mercury is at least possible to tool around in as it is,so that looks to be the better option.
I think my answer to both options would be “take out all the bad parts, replace them with good parts,” and I think that would just be easier and more rewarding with the Firebird.
The Firebird six has a proper detachable intake manifold. The Mercury six does not.
I’d give the birdie a clutch and visit the Clifford website for some engine bolt-ons.
Comet since it’s unique and in better shape even though normally I’d go for the Firebird(s). Also love Trans Am’s and miss Pontiac!
Mercury is growing on me; mainly the classics (Crazy bout a Mercury) but would love a Marauder
Also, that 8-Track story is the coolest thing I’ve heard in a while!
Grew up in the 70s,all these 70s low power hot rods are too common so VOMIT COMET it is.
My old man drove a faded yellow Comet with a Thriftpower 6 and a three in the tree into the mid 80’s. I loved the vestigial tail fins, they were from another time.
I voted Comet, as it’s turnkey.
The Firebird is in my eyes a good candidate to hot rod. LS swap and a 6 speed? Build up a Pontiac V8 if you can find one? But for my money, the Comet is a better buy.
It would be a stretch to channel Jim Garner in the Firebird, but I could definitely see Harry Dean Stanton, driving that Comet.
I’ll try to keep this short. Lol. We had a 62 Comet which my Dad bought new. Drove it out to California from Maryland. Somewhere around Kansas, I could hear a thrumming noise from the right rear wheel area. I was sitting right over it. Brother in left rear, Mom, Dad, and Sis in the front. Told my Dad, I think there’s a bearing going out back here! Dad: You’re only 12, what do you know? This is a brand new car!! Eventually we all could hear it! We took it to a dealer and yep, right rear wheel bearing bad! None in stock! Had to spend the night in the cockroach motel! You know..you turn out the lites and there’s lots of skittering noises!
Comet was our daily transportation for quite a few years, when the shaft that goes from the distributor to the oil pump failed. Lunched the motor.
Dad, not ready to get another car yet, gives me $250 to buy another engine! What?..
I go to the wrecking yard, and lucked out. Bought the engine and transmission out of a Falcon Sprint! 260 cid with the chrome package! Had it delivered, no change from the $250!
Pretty much bolted in with minor modifications. Dad was a machinist, made a sleeve for the rear tranny seal. Kept the original driveshaft and rear end. Had dual exhausts made. Replaced the bench seat with a pair of black Corvair bucket seats.
With the 6 rear end, it came out of hole pretty quick. Smoked the B 78 tire on the RR! Lol
Drove it for 3-4 years, motor got tired. Dad sent us to the yard again!
Replaced engine 2nd time. Never had the oomph of the Sprint Motor. Found out the 2nd engine was a rare 221 cid. Oh well.
Ours was a black 4 door with a red interior. Had a flashback when I saw this article.
Thanks for the memories!