Unless your only car is a BAC Mono, you’ll probably be driving around passengers at some point. After all, cars get greener when multiple people are onboard, splitting gas costs is a great way to make road trips cheaper, and hitching a ride is way nicer than putting up with North America’s lackluster public transit system. However, as every passenger knows, everyone’s car has specific rules, and you probably have a list for yours. Hell, I certainly have a list for mine.
Admittedly, passenger rules evolve depending on the car you’re driving. It’s easy to eat in a beater, but beaters might have rules like “don’t touch the window switch” or “don’t worry about that vibration” because of how stuff ends up broken during the perpetual cycle of neglect that eventually puts a car’s value down below $2,000. Likewise, it’s easy to be obsessive over new cars, but everyone has a different level of tolerance.
It should go without saying that many rules exist because something bad happened in the past, so most of the rules in my cars are based around safety or preventing problems. I’d like to think my list is short, but it could also make me sound terrible, so you be the judge.
- I choose the music
- No food because I hate crumbs
- If anyone needs a drink, I’m pulling over, because water takes ages to dry out of carpet underpadding
- No closing of doors with frameless windows by placing fingers on the glass
- Luggage must be secured for safety reasons
- No smoking
- No feet on the dashboard
- Everyone must be buckled in
- Don’t be a twat
Most of those rules are probably fairly reasonable and normal, but then again, who am I to assume what is normal, when I could just ask our wonderful readers? So, what rules do you have in your car?
(Photo credits: Toyota)
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Agree with most of this here, so no need to repeat. One pet peeve I have is when a passenger hops in with a bag and proceeds to keep it in their lap, especially in the front seat. When it just crowds the space or even blocks my sight lines it pisses me off. I’m always happy to pop the trunk or just let them throw it in the backseat, but the clutchy bag thing must stop.
Also, my sister in law somehow always manages to make a twisted mess out of the seat belt. It’s a running joke with my wife. I can always accurately tell her if her sister was in the car because the seatbelt is a braided mess.
Wiping boogers on the headliner is also frowned upon.
Obviously, everyone is buckled. No feet on the dashboard. Nothing crazy like half hanging out a window or sunroof.
In the RX-7, bottled water only, no other drinks, no food. I would much rather stop and have a snack or get a coffee than attempt to deal with this in that car. I replaced virtually everything in the interior with new or extremely gently used, so I’d like to keep it that way.
In the RX-8, any drink with a lid is fine, as at least it has cupholders. I still don’t let anyone eat in this car either. In my opinion, eating in any car you really care a lot about just isn’t worth it, your mileage may vary.
In my old 6, eating was fine. I just cleaned the car fairly often.
Same, even if my car has next to a quarter of a million miles and holes in the seats and has exhaust fumes that smell like a lawn mower and are very strong, which enter into the cabin because the convertible top is being held together by tape and bathroom caulking and hopes and dreams…
Where was I again?
Only 2 big ones really, the main one is don’t mess with me when I’m driving, don’t touch me, distract me or otherwise divert my attention. I will engage you when I feel it’s safe. Do not puke in my car. I have and will put someone out and drive away. I’m very attentive and won’t hesitate to pull off the road. Hell, I’ll do it gladly and help you any way I can. Just let me know.
Simple. You are not allowed to squeal before the tires.
My car, my music. If you can’t deal with Sirius XMU or the new Arctic Monkeys album, drive yourself. No, I won’t put on the hair-metal channel. Exception is if I’m driving mom. She gets the classic rock channel.
No smoking. Ever.
Food and drink are okay in the Kia, NOT in the Miata. NA Miata cupholders are symbolic at best and crumbs will disappear into the miniscule space under the seats which is impossible to clean.
Don’t slam the doors. It’s irritating.
No criticisms. Yes, the Miata is slow. It’s less slow without your fat ass in it.
NO FEET ON THE DASHBOARD.
This depends on the car. In the Miata, it’s basically just be gentle with the car. Don’t touch the glass, don’t be aggressive with any plastic bits. Try to keep it nice. Oh, and if the sun is out, the top WILL be down.
In the Thunderbird…
Don’t stomp on the floor, it’s rusty.
Don’t touch any switches, they don’t all do what they’re supposed to and some have been found to potentially short circuit things.
Don’t touch the dashboard or center console in general, I’m still getting it all sorted out.
Don’t freak out, I know it’s floaty, the handling is fine and you are not going to die.
Don’t ask about that thing, I see it, I’ve resolved not to think about it.
Don’t sit on the car. I can’t believe I have to tell people this. Sit IN the car if I say we can go for a ride, but the trunk is not a bench and you’re not allowed to Dukes-of-Hazard your butt across the hood.
In general, another one is don’t kick the rocker panels to get snow off your boots. Kick the curb, the ground, anything except the car. I’d even rather you got the carpets dirty than scrape your shoes on the rocker panels. I can clean the carpets, just don’t damage the outside of the car.
Also no eating messy things/leaving trash. I have enough messy trash of my own to deal with without other people leaving theirs.
I think most NA Miata drivers have pretty similar rules for their cars. I don’t want to come across like I’m driving a priceless Lalique vase with wheels, but I know how challenging some parts are to find and that most of the original ones still in the car are fragile 28-year-old plastic. Also the OEM-style center console cupholder is for show only as any hard turn will cause it to detach from the console and dump soda on my nice coco mats.
Pretty simple ones for me:
Sit like a human and wear your seatbelt.
No eating unless I say it’s okay; no smoking under any circumstances
Keep yourself and your accessories out of the way of my shifting arm
I choose the music, but if you hate it, I’ll change it to something else (that I choose)
It appears that no feet on the dash is almost universal here, as I came to say the same thing. I don’t need to witness your tibia getting embedded into your face if the airbags deploy.
I’m guessing “No eating the car” is a rule for doggos? I guess it could be one of those rules you assume goes without saying until “Headrest George” takes an unwelcome chomp…
Lol, it should have been no eating in the car but that too!
> No eating the car
Hard to argue with that rule.
These days, myself and my partner are pretty much the only people who ride in my car. He knows how much I care about keeping things clean and doesn’t even eat in his own car, so no issues there. But back when I was in college and a few years after that when I was a lot more social, the rules were:
No smoking. For most of the time I was a smoker I didn’t even smoke in my car.
No eating, no drinking anything other than water. Or black coffee, the only other thing I’d drink in my car.
No feet on the seats or dashboard.
Take out what you bring in. Idk why people thought it was okay to leave trash in someone else’s car.
I control the music. If you want to listen to something else, use headphones, not the speaker on your phone.
My family always kept their cars very clean. When I started driving and riding around with other people a lot more as a teenager, I was shocked at how much garbage people kept on the floors of their cars. My best friend had a Honda Civic with so much junk and trash in it that you couldn’t see the backseat. The passenger side floor was piled with trash up to the level of the seat. There were no rules, only chaos. Happily, she now keeps her current car cleaner than most people do.
Car doesn’t move without seat belts.
Feet belong in footwells.
No smoking or vaping.
I likely do not need a navigator, but if I do and you fail at your job, I will panic and you will be in trouble.
Totally agree with not closing the door with the glass on a frameless window. In my BRZ that is absolutely a rule.
Same in my BRZ, seeing the glass flex when they push against it freaks me out every damn time. The handle is right there and it’s in the name “handle”, I insist they use it.
Don’t complain about:
1). The temperature
2). The music
It’s really that simple. I’m driving so what I want goes. I run hot so my car is always going to be cool and I need music to keep me engaged. No one else gets the aux. If you want to listen to your top 40 or pop country crapola or something that’s fine, bring some headphones.
If I’m driving you’re probably going to hear old head hip hop, 80s alternative/goth/new wave, modern indie, classic/maybe a wee bit of modern metal, classic R&B like Earth Wind And Fire et Al, or classic/outlaw country depending on the drive and the mood.
Frankly you should be grateful that I’m willing to share my excellent taste with you 😉 Taylor Swift will still be there for you when we reach our destination.
Oh and also I don’t care about your directions or what your smart phone is telling you is the best route. Before we leave I check traffic, I pick a combination of routes that’ll work best, and that’s that. I know the DC area and pretty much everything between Richmond and Philly better than an algorithm does.
Edit: also whatever you bring, you take out. I love my car and I keep it pristine. I’m not here to clean up after you.
No driving suggestions or commentary unless you actually think we are about to get in an accident.
And I do think you’re being a little harsh about the no water rule – I live in a very wet place (Seattle) and my main car parks outside and still never have I ever had a long-term issue come from a water spill. No dairy products though. ???? if that doesn’t get cleaned up right.
I control the music
No food
I do the navigating. If we’re going somewhere that I haven’t been to and you have be prepared to provide turn by turn instructions
I used to be anti-food in the car, but gave that up once kids entered the picture. It wasn’t worth dying on that hill. What’s left though:
*No smoking
**No feet on the dash
Seatbelts on
*I will leave you on the curb if you so much as take a pack out of your pocket.
**My wife’s whole family does this, and it drives me bonkers. My wife has at least smartened up about this after hearing about a woman who was basically snapped in half after an accident. Glad I don’t have to have that argument anymore.
I didn’t see the most important rule:
If you bring it in, take it out. Including farts.
No smoking has always been one of my rules, despite growing up with smoker parents. This includes vaping, much to the chagrin of a couple passengers I have had.
Your trash leaves with you.
Wear your damn seatbelt.
Don’t force anything.
Be careful with food.
I have only had to spell out these rules once or twice, because I try to associate with reasonably polite people. I’ve never had the rule about feet on the dashboard because I’ve never had anyone try, but that’s a no-go, too.
A current one in my daily is not to mess with my climate control. I have dual zone climate, and the passenger side is fine to mess with. But please just adjust it and don’t close the vents. You can turn on the driver only mode if you truly don’t want any sort of climate control on the passenger side.
No side seat driving, I hate hearing comments or suggestions.
obvious ones:
no smoking
wear your seat belt
your feet stay on the floor
no messy foods or beverages
My major one:
Do Not Touch The Volume Knob – I use the steering wheel button for volume and it bothers me when the little power symbol on the knob it’s perfectly straight up.
I know I have issues, you don’t need to point it out.
Minor one:
On a road trip, if we stop somewhere that has food, please grab a couple of extra paper napkins for the glove box emergency stash.
I get it, but you could also just put a sticker over the symbol and not have to worry about it. (Not a criticism, just something that I’ve seen done. My current car does not have markings on the knob, and my pickup only has the knob, and any markings are long worn off.)
No farts
Except for me. The driver gets to rip ass as they please.
This one is important in my car because 3 out of 4 window regulators are broken.
everyone buckled
the floor is the only place for feet
That’s about it for hard and fast rules.
I would add no smoking or similar, but I’ve never had that ever come up so its never been an issue.
Quit kicking the trunk lid or I’m adding more zip ties
Is that you Dad? (Eric Trump)
You’re not using enough chloroform.
Need some rust holes for the exhaust to leak in.